Get the paperwork right

Our family had to follow Jon to London, where he was on a two-year assignment. The children were toddlers, so it was very exciting, and not too much trouble.

I was a cat breeder at the time and it seemed likely that I might want to import new blood to South Africa. As I knew that importing animals might be tricky, I contacted the Veterinary Services department to get all the information beforehand. So, armed with forms to fill in and questions to ask, we examined the cat scene in England.

One of the important contacts was the late Roy Robinson who was the local guru on animal genetics, particularly that of small mammals including cats. Through him we decided to import, apart from two cats, a pair of a small species of hamster – still rare at that stage.

At the end of the two years we flew back to South Africa - minus Jon, as he had a few loose ends to tie up. We were returning to a non-existent home, and so had a lot of necessities in our baggage. In addition to the two cat cages and the hamster box, we checked in twelve suitcases, boxes and parcels.

As fate would have it, in the days when smoking was still allowed in aircraft, we were accidentally booked in the smoking section. In spite of the misery and whimpering of the children, the chain cigar smoker would not desist. So, early on a Sunday morning in Johannesburg, I disembarked with two tired, fractious children and proceeded to claim the howling cats, hamsters and other parcels. At this stage my heart was in my boots at the thought of having to open and explain all the cases.

The immigration officer confronted with this cacophonous menagerie did the obvious thing and said, “Have you got a permit to bring these animals in?”

That is where things started going right for the first time in twelve hours. He took my carefully-compiled papers, examined the cargo, and phoned Veterinary Services. On getting a positive response, he turned to me with a big smile and waved me and my parcels straight through!

The Golden Rule

In general people know what moves them better than they understand what moves others. Those who are very analytical, introspective or self-aware understand their own motivations, feelings and wishes. And, innately, they are inclined to follow these promptings. Even those blessed with less self-awareness, do the same.

It is much easier for me to excuse, explain or pardon my own failings than to forgive the faults of others. Not necessarily because I am more selfish (although I might be), but simply because I can't see into another's heart. I would have to make allowance for the unknown factors prompting someone else's actions. Napoleon had an inkling when he said, “Don't ascribe to malice that which can better be explained by stupidity.”

Many people believe that their actions are directed by some outside agency; even fate or karma. Nonetheless, they still act as they “want” to act. If I say that I do only what I want to do, this does not mean that I will now steal another's car because I like the look of it. No, I “want” to remain in the good books of the law enforcers. In a sense my actions are directed by the law.

So we all do as we see fit, in many ways. Of course, this does not mean that we are chained to a destiny. There are still choices. We can follow the widely accepted principle that it is good to do unto others as we would like them to do unto us.

Why is it so hard, though? Is it because the heat of an impulsive response overturns the cool reason of altruism? Is it selfishness trumping kindness?